How do you describe your mother?
When you talk about your mother, what words are you using? What kind of tone are
your having while describing her?
Do you say; my mother is:
Mentally ill? Crazy? Fuck up? Narcissistic? Or do you use a description like:
She’s toxic, witch, bitch, selfish, cold, abusive, manipulative or stupid?
When you use some of these words, how do they make you feel?
Bitter? Disconnected? Cold? Bitchy? Angry? Or guilty, drained, small and bad?
Being part of a few social media groups and connecting with the women I get to coach
on, I found that many adult daughters are using negative, loaded words to describe their
mothers. These women want to free themselves from their mothers and reclaim their
lives. They are unhappy and don’t know how to feel better.
These women are often not aware that words have energy, vibration. They’re also not
aware of how their mind is working and that the use of words is directly connected to their
So how using negative expressions and your inability to feel
better has to do with each other?
Let me explain.
When you use negative words, it influences how you feel.
Your mother may be cold, self absorbs, selfish and emotionally
unavailable. It’s not a question of what is true or not. The question is how
are you feeling in the end?
Is it serving you to use these words?
What feelings are you perpetuating while talking or thinking about
If you call your mother a toxic bitch, do you feel amazing?
Do you feel positive energy inside of you?
I doubt it.
Calling her a toxic bitch will result in acting like her.
By using these words, you will create negative feelings for yourself like; bitterness,
resentfulness, and Anger.
How do you act when you’re bitter and resentful?
You most likely be bitchy as well right? It’s normal we all do. You’ll attack back,
blame, judge, being a bit insulting making comments and being mean.
These actions result in generating more toxicity and bitchiness in your life.
Is that serving you?
Is that something you want to feel and have in your daily life?
Your mother may really be a “bitch” behaving in a toxic hurtful way.
But I worry about you.
Not about your mother.
You are hurting yourself when you are negatively naming your mother.
You may think you are punishing her and that she deserves to be called that way.
But you are punishing yourself and your loved ones.
So you might ask me; do I need now to describe her as a wonderful amazing mother?
No, you dont.
But try this;
My mom/ my mother… whatever works for you.
It’s still a fact, she gave birth to you.
And that way you keep it neutral.
Feeling neutral will help you to take the first steps towards your freedom
and reclaiming your life.
Bitterness and resentfulness will stall your happiness, and you’ll find
yourself stuck in this vicious cycle forever.
P.S. I understand how stuck you might be feeling right now.
You may find it hard to stop being resentful at your mother, letting go of
your anger and bitterness. And at the same time wanting to feel at peace
and free yourself from her and all the negativity.
I think it’s a great time to try something you never tried before;
A FREE 30 minutes coaching session. This is the best and fastest way I
can help you get unstuck.
Click here to sign up, and I’ll teach you how to feel better!